There are a number of encounters in the Gospel of John between Jesus and those he comes across; encounters quite unlike those recorded in the other Gospels. They are not brief moments of healing or admonishment, but sustained interactions characterized by deep, theological conversation through which the person is transformed, and goes away to proclaim the Good News. Although the word ‘apostle’ doesn’t actually occur in John’s Gospel, these people nevertheless become apostles through word and action.

Nicodemus is just such a person. Jesus engages him in a deeply theological conversation, according to the pattern. But unlike the others Jesus encounters in this way, Nicodemus is not immediately transformed. In fact, it seems he never reaches a point of understanding in this conversation at all. We don’t know what he does after this, but we see him twice more: first defending Jesus in front of the temple leaders, then preparing Jesus’ body for burial. His transformation is not immediate; it takes time.

So why does this matter for us in Lent? Perhaps because – like Nicodemus looking for logical answers – we too are often looking for a quick fix. On the outside we do all the ‘right’ things, but then we give up when we aren’t suddenly holier, or hearing God’s voice or feeling God’s presence the way we expect to. We get frustrated when things take longer than we want them to. We know what we want, and we want it now.

But discipleship doesn’t work like that… not much in life does, for that matter.

Thankfully, Jesus has experience dealing with human impatience, and does not give up on us. During those periods when nothing seems to be working, when all our prayers seem to fall flat, and when God seems very far away, we may be reminded by Nicodemus’ example that we cannot grow in discipleship through our own will: not by saying the right prayers, performing the correct rituals, or even faithfully executing our Lenten disciplines. Flesh does not give birth to Spirit: only God can do that. And when we are ready to be content with waiting on God, we discover that God was always there, waiting for us.

Mother Amanda

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On Ash Wednesday each year, we are invited to observe a holy Lent by self-examination, penitence, prayer, fasting and almsgiving, and by reading and meditating on the word of God.

Fasting is the restriction of one’s intake of food. Even in the strictest of traditions, however, fasting is omitted when it may be a detriment to one’s health, when one is travelling or ill, when one is receiving the hospitality of others, or when one has specific health needs.

Abstinence, therefore, may be a much more reasonable practice for many. Refraining from something – whether meat, dairy, alcohol, social media, online shopping, or any other habits which (especially when overconsumed) may draw us away from the connection with our bodies and with Christ, may be very helpful to assist us in our Lenten journey.

In that spirit, you will notice for the period of Lent, that the Sunday bulletins will have fewer printed portions than you have become accustomed to. Some of the readings will be omitted, as well as the intercessions and other areas of text. This is to encourage us as a worshipping body to lift our eyes away from the book and up towards the mystery all around us: at the altar, of course, but also, perhaps, the light streaming through the windows; the beautiful art and architecture; the dance of the liturgy.

You will also notice a shift in liturgical language and music; the language will be more traditional, the organ music less exuberant; there will be more contemplative themes and tones.

There may be some feelings of discomfort attached to these changes, and if so, I encourage you to lean into that discomfort, and use it as an opportunity to focus on Christ; to identify more closely with his suffering in the wilderness and on the journey to the cross. And may all that we do – or abstain from – serve to deepen our discipleship and draw us nearer to the One who gave up everything for the love of us.

Mother Amanda

Click here to find the Liturgy at Home for Sunday